In Martin Luther King’s 1963 “I Have a Dream” speech, there’s one line out of several that still rings as a desired outcome decades later. It is: “I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character.”

As of 2021,

MLK’s children are no longer little any more - they are fully grown adults with children.
Our nation is still wrestling with undoing laws that judge Americans based on skin color.
And daily we are learning to judge a person for their character over color.

Which leads me to this question: How do you judge one’s character?

Like really think about that for a moment. Setting biases aside (language of origin, skin color, region of upbringing, etc.) could you be a good judge of character? Over the years, have you been a good judge of friends? A good judge of intimate partners? A good judge of professor selection? Of career paths? Or of financial commitments?

Now I am not a character expert and nor do I have 3 quick and easy ways to help you be a better judge of character. No! That is not the objective of this blog post. To be transparent, I am constantly identifying areas of my character to improve. And it is from those areas that I offer suggestions on how to initially be a judge of character.

Over the years I have realized that character evolves over time. My 22 year old character greatly refined from my 18 year old character. My 28 year old character greatly refined from my 22 year old character. And my current day character has come a great distance from my 28 year old character. So here are a few recommended tips to be a better judge of character:

Communication - the articulation of language one chooses tells a great deal about the experiences of life explored to shape one's views. The more you discuss with a person, the more it helps to understand where someone stands on family, work ethics, politics, faith, clothing, food, and dang near everything. The mouth speaks what the brain and heart has reasoned as societal inputs. You either say a lot or say little - either way, the words you use to communicate gives insight to your character. In school, vocabulary lessons are given to help broaden our view of word choices. Unless you are a journalist, editor, novelist, or some extreme lover of words you may struggle to express your views at times. And that is ok. But as the saying goes, “Think before you speak.” Think with the best intentions of your heart and “say” them.
Pressure - what you “do” in the varying moments of pressure can say a lot. Just as your response “from” pressure can say a lot. Actions displayed as reactions and responses can be an indicator of one’s character. I’ve heard the term “good pressure” used before. Could it be that when someone feels pressure they are determined to not collapse under pressure but to conquer over pressure with good and healthy choices. We all have faced pressure in life or will face pressure in our life and it is hard to know exactly how we will respond. I totally understand! But hopefully you take time to reflect back on your actions once life under pressure has dissipated. In the midst of storms, it is hard to self reflect. But reflection of our responses and reactions are great ways to redefine character.
Tone - what we say or what we do carry tone. It is the distinctive way in which you carry out the words you speak or the way you give motion to your actions that makes all the difference. If I ask you to pass me the salt shaker, you can either pass it to me cautiously and with care until I have the salt shaker you can pass it to me swiftly and speedily causing the salt from the salt shaker to spill on me. You’ve seen poems recited before? Some may recite the words from a poem and make you feel as if every word written came to life or some may recite a poem and you wish you could release them from the misery of having to say any words. Think of tone as the distinct way you leave an impression on others through what you say and do.
How do you judge character? I want to know your thoughts.

How do you Judge Content of Character?

Where we achieve WINS in life!